This morning, I am very grateful for my alarm which woke me up right on time. Yet, soon after I got out of bed, my mind started racing as I quickly went through the activities of the day in my head. I soon realized that I needed to pause and think about God because otherwise, I could easily go through the whole day without ever giving Him a thought. As often happens, He led my mind and heart to meditate on the Italian term "lento." Please, allow me to share some of what I have gleaned.
The musical term lento (slow, sluggish) requires a deliberate effort to make ourselves slow down. Music professors often wear themselves out telling their students over and over that they rush especially in difficult passages. In order for true lento to take place, the approach of the artist must contain such intensity and cohesiveness that the music is held together beautifully. In contrast, the tempo of the life of a musician can be so frenzied that agitato and prestissimo are the more appropriate terms to be used to describe it. Our Lord, however, does not intend for us to live such harried lives because it is difficult to hear His voice in those cases. Slowing down offers us the opportunity to hear His voice with utmost clarity. The cohesiveness that results from that will afford us great musical and spiritual victories.
Nowadays, my mind continuously dwells on my duties at school. I must say that as a teacher, I look at the approaching month of May both with a sense of dread and anticipation. Dread, because looking at my calendar reveals a schedule which is packed with all kinds of activities, finals, papers and exams to grade, concerts to attend, and a growing list of time-sensitive projects. Anticipation, because May is the month that puts an end to this busy season of my life.
Whether or not you are currently engaged in academic life, you can probably agree with me that busy-ness threatens to bury us under its deathlike grip. Its relentless and frenetic pace has the power to throw people from side to side in a dizzying whirlwind as they go from one thing to another with very little room to breathe in between. I have to admit that I, for one, lose focus and clarity of thought when my life is similarly packed. I find myself thinking, saying, and doing things like:
"I'd better slow down because I'm not getting it."
"I need to catch my breath."
"This is too fast for me."
"Sigh."
"Just keep breathing."
"Okay, gotta wait, gotta stop, gotta rest my body a little tonight."
The reality of the matter is the human body is not a machine. Despite the tendency to rush through almost everything and to go non-stop, people find that their bodies and minds will sooner or later require a drastic change of pace. It is that very principle that gives a driver the wisdom to slow down before exiting the highway. Without slowing down, he/she will not have the clarity of mind to spot the exit sign, to steer the car in a safe manner, to recognize landmarks which will confirm his/her arrival at the proper destination, to avoid hitting other cars or killing pedestrians. When we do not slow down as people, we often get sick because one way or another our bodies require that alteration of speed.
Failure to slow down causes us to stop caring about what truly matters. There is such a profusion of noise, clamor, speed, and traffic in the hyperactive lifestyle promoted by our culture that it is often tempting to tune out the desperate cries of people who are in legitimate need. We do not have the time to pay attention to people who are slowing us down. We lose discernment and our perspectives are often skewed when in times of incessant activity. Do we feel so overwhelmingly busy that we simply cannot get everything done? Do we find ourselves wishing that there were more than 24 hours, more than 7 days, more than 52 weeks, and more than 12 months? Are the things that keep us so busy merely distractions that mar our ability to focus?
God thinks that we will benefit greatly if we do slow down. In fact, He wants us to stop and be still because in the stillness we are led to know Him. A passage that clearly illustrates that truth is Psalm 46:10,
"Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
Knowing God is the best thing we can do. We can be armed with the courage to face turmoil, conflicts, fear, weaknesses, destruction, malice, and certainly busy-ness because we know that there is someone who has the power to end and control all of it. Knowing God leads us to honor Him and to live in harmony with other human beings since He has called us to peace.
"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful." Colossians 3:15
So, my friends, be encouraged. Take time to pause even if it is just for a minute. Take some deep breaths and slow down. You will worry less, you will stumble less, and you will be grateful more often.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
Stage Fright
As I continue on my quest to do an in-depth study of a specific virtue each month, my understanding of God's grace has deepened. My study of courage for the month of April has been a reminder that I am truly undeserving of God's favor and that any sign of bravery on my part can only be the work of the God-Head: the unending love of the Father, the ultimate sacrifice of the Son, and the ongoing empowering/indwelling of the Holy Spirit. He is everything and I am nothing. As I submit my nothingness to His abundance, I need not fret because He is certainly "my refuge, my strength, my anchor, my bulwark, my ever-present help in trouble, my song in the night."
The deeper I delve into this focus on courage as a virtue, the more I am reminded by God's Word that our lives are plagued with fear. One particular fear to which many musicians can relate is that of stage fright or performance anxiety. Uninvited though it may be, this guest always comes at the most inopportune moment. At times, it seems that the more important the performance, the more likely it is to show its ugly head. As I reflect on the ways in which I have been affected by stage fright in my career, I see some connections that not only apply to music but also link other areas of living with the principles taught by the Bible.
One such connection is the fact that poor preparation always leads to performance anxiety. Poor preparation is unique as it always relates to time management. It could be that I did not have enough advance notice to be ready for the performance. Sometimes I was given the wrong information concerning what specific piece to learn. It might be a matter of procrastination which robbed me of the adequate or necessary time to thoroughly prepare myself. It could be still that I was simply inefficient during the practice sessions choosing to use the wrong approach as I rehearsed which renders me completely ineffective in performance. Or, it could be that I opted to do nothing to prepare myself and simply hoped that I could wing it.
Another is that stage fright stems from the performer's wrong focus on the audience. When I think of who is potentially hearing me sing, then I start re-evaluating the choices I had made and the technical principles I had drilled into my body and mind. I get distracted and tempted to change things or to improvise in order that I might impress my audience. Then, doubt enters my mind: did I choose the right pieces? Are there enough high notes on this program? Is my outfit stylish enough? Such superfluous thinking renders me completely ungrounded and nervousness starts to reign in my heart.
A final connection is the fact that self-focus is the most deadly choice in terms of performance stress. When I focus on myself in performance, I almost always get plagued with fear before the performance is over. Since no performance is perfect, then each time a little flaw comes up, I hear it in my head as though a commentator was giving the audience a blow by blow report on my performance. At that point, I hear a little voice inside of me putting me down:
I knew you couldn't do it.
What made you think you were good enough?
Nobody's ever gonna want to hear you again.
You might as well quit right now.
Your voice is gonna crack at any moment now.
The tenor who sang before you was so much better.
And on, and on, and on... For others, it may be different but the truth of the matter is every time we focus on ourselves our minds play tricks on us and we end up completely disoriented. Nervousness then becomes the message we bear instead of the one prescribed by the composer.
This morning, I am reminded that life is a performance which inspires a great deal of fear in people. We are all guilty of being the prey of our nerves. We are afraid of introducing ourselves to people. We are afraid of being single and afraid of getting married. We are afraid of being barren and afraid of having too many children. We are terrified about public speaking. We worry that people might not like us or not accept us. We whine about the treatment we receive from others. We triple-guess ourselves before every step we take for fear of making the wrong move. We are afraid of not taking advantage of a deal only to have buyer's remorse after a shopping spree. We are constantly afraid. Especially nowadays, we are accustomed to hearing so much depressing news that we are afraid of flying, driving, and even walking in a park. We are afraid of our spouses, other family members, neighbors, friends, and co-workers. We are sometimes afraid of goingto a store or a bank for fear of being shot by robbers. We are afraid of natural disasters, an economic collapse, betrayals, and the list could go on.
Living rightly and boldly requires excellent preparation, the right audience, and the right focus. The answer is found nowhere else but in God.
a) The training/instruction God provides in His Word is more than excellent preparation for a life well-lived. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 reads,
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work."
So, we can rest assured that the Master teacher is ready to instruct us at all times through His word if we would only go to Him. In fact, Psalm 32:8 tells us that,
"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you."
What more could we need?
b) We need to realize that our audience is the audience of One: God and only God. When we go onstage to perform, the people in the seats are merely observers, they are not our main audience. So, it matters not if they do not clap nor like our offering because God is applauding. In life, we should strive to no longer desire the empty praises of human beings but seek to honor God with our actions. His approval should be our number one priority. Psalm 5:12 declares,
"For surely, O Lord, you love the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield."
c) The right focus is the worship of God in every circumstance. If I focus on myself, then I commit idolatry. We need to focus on God in good times and bad times. In good times, we ought to praise His name with thanksgiving in our hearts. In bad times, we must thank Him for the affliction because we know that godly sorrow will lead to righteousness. Psalm 16:8 instructs us rightly,
"I have set the Lord always before me, because He is at my right hand, I will never be shaken."
Have you ever been shaken? I know I have. Yet, should we fear? No, absolutely not. Whom shall I fear? No one. Why should we not fear? Because He promised He would never leave nor forsake us regardless of how it seems on the outside. He says that He holds everything in His hand. He is in control.
May God preserve us and embolden us to fight the good fight until the day of the Lord!
The deeper I delve into this focus on courage as a virtue, the more I am reminded by God's Word that our lives are plagued with fear. One particular fear to which many musicians can relate is that of stage fright or performance anxiety. Uninvited though it may be, this guest always comes at the most inopportune moment. At times, it seems that the more important the performance, the more likely it is to show its ugly head. As I reflect on the ways in which I have been affected by stage fright in my career, I see some connections that not only apply to music but also link other areas of living with the principles taught by the Bible.
One such connection is the fact that poor preparation always leads to performance anxiety. Poor preparation is unique as it always relates to time management. It could be that I did not have enough advance notice to be ready for the performance. Sometimes I was given the wrong information concerning what specific piece to learn. It might be a matter of procrastination which robbed me of the adequate or necessary time to thoroughly prepare myself. It could be still that I was simply inefficient during the practice sessions choosing to use the wrong approach as I rehearsed which renders me completely ineffective in performance. Or, it could be that I opted to do nothing to prepare myself and simply hoped that I could wing it.
Another is that stage fright stems from the performer's wrong focus on the audience. When I think of who is potentially hearing me sing, then I start re-evaluating the choices I had made and the technical principles I had drilled into my body and mind. I get distracted and tempted to change things or to improvise in order that I might impress my audience. Then, doubt enters my mind: did I choose the right pieces? Are there enough high notes on this program? Is my outfit stylish enough? Such superfluous thinking renders me completely ungrounded and nervousness starts to reign in my heart.
A final connection is the fact that self-focus is the most deadly choice in terms of performance stress. When I focus on myself in performance, I almost always get plagued with fear before the performance is over. Since no performance is perfect, then each time a little flaw comes up, I hear it in my head as though a commentator was giving the audience a blow by blow report on my performance. At that point, I hear a little voice inside of me putting me down:
I knew you couldn't do it.
What made you think you were good enough?
Nobody's ever gonna want to hear you again.
You might as well quit right now.
Your voice is gonna crack at any moment now.
The tenor who sang before you was so much better.
And on, and on, and on... For others, it may be different but the truth of the matter is every time we focus on ourselves our minds play tricks on us and we end up completely disoriented. Nervousness then becomes the message we bear instead of the one prescribed by the composer.
This morning, I am reminded that life is a performance which inspires a great deal of fear in people. We are all guilty of being the prey of our nerves. We are afraid of introducing ourselves to people. We are afraid of being single and afraid of getting married. We are afraid of being barren and afraid of having too many children. We are terrified about public speaking. We worry that people might not like us or not accept us. We whine about the treatment we receive from others. We triple-guess ourselves before every step we take for fear of making the wrong move. We are afraid of not taking advantage of a deal only to have buyer's remorse after a shopping spree. We are constantly afraid. Especially nowadays, we are accustomed to hearing so much depressing news that we are afraid of flying, driving, and even walking in a park. We are afraid of our spouses, other family members, neighbors, friends, and co-workers. We are sometimes afraid of goingto a store or a bank for fear of being shot by robbers. We are afraid of natural disasters, an economic collapse, betrayals, and the list could go on.
Living rightly and boldly requires excellent preparation, the right audience, and the right focus. The answer is found nowhere else but in God.
a) The training/instruction God provides in His Word is more than excellent preparation for a life well-lived. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 reads,
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work."
So, we can rest assured that the Master teacher is ready to instruct us at all times through His word if we would only go to Him. In fact, Psalm 32:8 tells us that,
"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you."
What more could we need?
b) We need to realize that our audience is the audience of One: God and only God. When we go onstage to perform, the people in the seats are merely observers, they are not our main audience. So, it matters not if they do not clap nor like our offering because God is applauding. In life, we should strive to no longer desire the empty praises of human beings but seek to honor God with our actions. His approval should be our number one priority. Psalm 5:12 declares,
"For surely, O Lord, you love the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield."
c) The right focus is the worship of God in every circumstance. If I focus on myself, then I commit idolatry. We need to focus on God in good times and bad times. In good times, we ought to praise His name with thanksgiving in our hearts. In bad times, we must thank Him for the affliction because we know that godly sorrow will lead to righteousness. Psalm 16:8 instructs us rightly,
"I have set the Lord always before me, because He is at my right hand, I will never be shaken."
Have you ever been shaken? I know I have. Yet, should we fear? No, absolutely not. Whom shall I fear? No one. Why should we not fear? Because He promised He would never leave nor forsake us regardless of how it seems on the outside. He says that He holds everything in His hand. He is in control.
May God preserve us and embolden us to fight the good fight until the day of the Lord!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
